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I got closer to my eldest son again in the C-years, due to our special life circumstances. We were able to put our relationship on a new, adult footing.
In the past few months, communication has been a bit awkward. A new girlfriend, we needed to find each other again and we hadn't yet succeeded. “What does it need from my side?” I asked myself. And somewhere in the back of my mind and feeling was: “I'm doing something wrong.”

A few days ago, we spent an evening together at a concert and out for dinner. We felt comfortable and our conversation went well and smoothly.
As we were driving home, I felt pain in my right neck. (I am left-handed).
I was able to deal with it immediately (my self-esteem as a mom was restored. I'm doing it right.) and after a day it was all over again.

Note from Ingmar Marquardt:
She couldn't find a solution intellectually at first (“Intellectual self-worth conflict”, concerning the cervical spine area). The beautiful evening together was then the solution, so that the pain/inflammation subsequently occurred in the conflict-resolved phase. ...